Through clenched teeth, in municipal yet verdant parkland, sprawled on grass, Blodgett recited the alphabet.
“A is for vinegar,” he grunted, “B is for worms, C is for villains swinging from the gallows…”
A little voice inside Blodgett’s head told him to stop. He knew he had got it wrong again. He rolled himself down the gentle incline of the grass until he came to rest. Then he sat up and picked flecks of plant-life out of his hair. The sun was shining but the park was almost deserted. He peered across the green towards the choc ice tent, and licked his lips. Would he splash out on a choc ice? Blodgett fumbled in his pockets for change, but they were empty. He wondered if there was anybody in charge of the choc ice tent. Perhaps it, too, was deserted, and the choc ices were there for the taking. It was more likely that there would be some kind of automatic choc ice dispenser, but Blodgett knew he could jimmy it open with his jimmy. He recalled that he had left his jimmy at home, in a cupboard, with his empty yohoort cartons. Blodgett always pronounced “yogurt” as “yohoort”, he was that kind of guy. He lay down again and closed his eyes and clenched his teeth and made yet another attempt at the alphabet…
- Impending Juxtaposition of Blubber and Tallow ( An anouncement concerning an important lecture by Mr Taplow ).
- It Was Dusk ( The Ghost of Old Halob & Bobnit Tivol )
- Weathering The Storm
- The Agony in the Garden ( A tale of nocturnal observation )
- Through Clenched Teeth
- An extract from “The English Gipsies And Their Language” by Charles G Leland
- Boost Your Bird Recognition Skills
- Witless Fabiola ( An important Tundist Archetype )
This episode was first broadcast on August 10th 2005. You can find scripts, notes and additional material on the Hooting Yard website.