Category Archives: Harmon e. Phraisyar

Who knows what fruits the lord will provide him with on the day.

Harmon e. Phraisyar: The Digital Age

Educational programming for the attention-deficient.

The esteemed Professor L. Ron Breful explores the facets of digital technology for your edification. L. Ron’s discourse is aided by his talking computer and frequently interrupted by his teenage daughter, Margaret.

Musical distractions are provided by L. Ron himself and a whole lotta tourists watching girls bang a gong.

Harmon e. Phraisyar: 2 Lame 2 Laborious

Harmon awakes in the Global Village once more, where information, information, information is required. 307 is holding a modern art contest and villagers who fail to exhibit face, naturally, a terrible fate. Time for Mr. e. to vegetate in front of television for inspiration.

Later, at the opening, Harmon meets his fellow exhibitors: a shelf-stacking Tori Amos and one of Saddam’s daughters, showing a decidedly novel new air freshener dispenser. “What does it mean?” Good point, Damien.

Harmon e. Phraisyar: Holiday ’68

Harmon’s benevolent captors insist that his mind-balance will be improved if he takes a holiday. But where to go, when everywhere in the Global Village is the same?

Well, for a start, there’s Loser’s Glitch, a town populated with bloodthirsty improvising musicians and policed by cranky ex-EastEnder Ms. T. Outhwaite. Now, that sounds like a fun place to spend one’s vacations. Happy landings, Harmon! Cliff Michelmore presents.

Harmon e. Phraisyar: Great Land And Sea Battles

More haphazard adventuring with the fleecy-testicled DJ. This time around, Harmon appears to have died and become reincarnated on a gas-powered parallel earth where he’s wanted for crimes committed by his alternate self.

His sinister new landlady, Mrs. Bassetthorn briefs Mr. e on the method of his escape: he’s to do away with a professor bound for Iraq and take on her identity. Musical interludes feature aeroplanes, fast trains, heavy metal, radio and shadowy transmissions.

Harmon e. Phraisyar: Dictator Creator

Socio-political commentary in this edition, in which we find Harmon in the Global Village, playing with the Resonance Radio computer. Dictator Creator is a “sim game” in which you can build your own despot. Sound like fun? Then why not join Harmon in sampling the results?

We hear from a ghostly voice emitting unintelligible, half-composed sentences and a far-right-wing loony who wants to eradicate pensioners, interspersed with apocalyptic grooves and cyber-army marches.

Harmon e. Phraisyar: If You can, Dig It

For various hellishly complex reasons, Harmon is obliged to murder and impersonate a famous female archaeologist. Will our hero accomplish the deed in time to catch to the next flight to Iraq from Croydon Rocket-Port?

Warning: This episode features sinister nocturnal activities and bogus archaeology.

Harmon e. Phraysier: Universal Signifier Sucks!

Harman e Phrayser has just entered a time portal disguised as the notorious female archaeologist, Professor Bronte Twiblett-Jones.

Now he’s popped out the other end “like toothpaste from a tube”… but which of the multitude of infinite paralell universes has he ended up in? This question and many others will be answered in this week’s fun-packed episode of the Harmon e. Phraysier show.

Harmon e. Phraysier: Camp Fires

Harmon e. Phrayser is still trapped in the Global Village, a place where all the the bad DJs get sent as a kind of punishment (or something like that).

Concerned by Harmon’s inability to organise an escape plot, Harmon is forced to attend iprov / storytelling evening, in which the residents exchange strange stories around a camp fire.