Today it is of decisive importance that I tell you about Blodgettesque farming methods. The techniques pioneered by Blodgett in his heyday are breathtaking. Consider, for example, the uses to which a Blodgettian farmer will put hay. There are many, many diagrams in the manual which show bales of hay being commandeered for all sorts of inventive purposes, all over the farmyard, in all six seasons of the year. That’s right, six seasons. One of Blodgett’s most telling innovations was his calendrical recalibration, if I am using the word correctly. Out go winter, spring, summer and autumn, or fall, as they say in Pining & Pothorst Land; in come tally, spate, the time of mighty remonstrations, tack, hub and bolismus. So, come hub come the haywain, as the saying goes, with his big fat boots stuffed with straw? I mean hay.

• Blodgettesque Farming Methods
• Life and Loves of the Immersion Man
• Four extracts from Dobson’s autobiography
• Petrochemical Shiver-me-Timbers Conclave
• At home with Tanquod Shuddery (A tale of generosity)
• A guide to Pointy Town

This episode was first broadcast on May 11th 2005.